Monthly Archives: October 2014

Vietnam on a motorbike – The beginning

It was 7.30 In the morning of 9th of October I head off from my hotel to fight the morning traffic. I had not slept too well the night before, I was a bit nervous since I have little idea of what to expect. All kind of things could go wrong and I didn’t have any backup in case they did.

The people who had motorbiked Vietnam told me horror stories of the traffic in the coast, as a very wise man I decided to take the western route. First stop was scheduled to be at a little village called Lam Son.

Traffic in Hanoi

Traffic in Hanoi

I had been on the bike a few hours and managed to get out of the booming traffic of Hanoi. I stopped for a lunch where there was a group of motorcyclists from France enjoying their lunch. They have a guide mechanic with them, nice bikes and all the gear you would ever imagine on having.

I just park my 1978 Honda Dream next to their motorcycles. It stands out from the crowd a bit. They might have looked at me with a bit of that’s sad look.


Which is more beautiful, the bike or the view?

I looked back at them with my own that’s sad look.

Which one is more bad ass?

Here I am by myself going through Vietnam with a 155€ bike. It will probably break down, I will probably be stranded alone somewhere having to hustle through it. It is going to be more dangerous and it is going to be more challenging. All this just makes it even more awesome.

River is flowing the road

River is flowing the road

There is a way to look everything in a new light. Self-reliance and freedom. If you make it through this you can pretty much make it through anything, you need nobody.


When I arrived at my first night stop in Lam Son it was quite a relief, I had at least made it somewhere, the bike had shown me what it is capable of and I started to have more confidence in the equipment. After the first day I was confident that we could make it to Saigon.


It was already very late when I went to the town to look for food. I Ended up having dinner with the locals. They were so proud of somebody actually ending up in their little town that they wanted dine & vine their guest. Vietnamese rice Vine and local delicacies as much as I could eat.


Chicken fetus. Not bad, a lot more meaty than an undeveloped egg would be

DCIM100GOPRODCIM100GOPRODCIM100GOPROmap2The next target after Lam son was a national park. 389 Kilometers away. I would take a night somewhere on the middle.


You could smell the malaria in the air

I ended up taking it in a Village where it seemed like they had never seen a white person before. It is a bit of a weird feeling when everybody is staring at you when you walk in the streets. Felt like a bit of a celebrity but I didn’t like the attention.

DCIM100GOPROIn the north there were lot of scenic rivers








After 3 days of driving I get to my first real destination. A national park called Khách sạn gần Kep National Park. Famous for its caves, it has become quite a tourist destination in just a few short years.


500 Kilometers done. About 1500 left.

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Buying a bike in Hanoi and driving to Cambodia

It was in Pai, Thailand that the idea of driving a motorbike through Vietnam sparked. I applied for the one month Visa and flew to Hanoi in north Vietnam. Originally I was supposed to do it with a friend. Unfortunately he pussied out and I was erring on the side of not doing it solo. Everybody said they wouldn’t do it by themselves and I bought in to their advice.

That was until I met this one New Zealand dude who doing Vietnam by himself on a motorbike. He was so convinced that it was an awesome idea that it got me thinking about it again.

I am in Southeast Asia in the first place because of self-reliance. I didn’t put off this trip because I was waiting for people to do it with me. Sure it would be challenging, but worst case scenario it completely blows up and I learn a little bit of self-sufficiency. 🙂20141011_150532

Initially I was looking for a scooter. Got familiar with the models and was looking for a Yamaha. Really easy to drive and simple. Test drove a couple of them. Was settling to buy a newest model for 350$. When i decided to go check out one more shop and I was about to leave when i noticed a traveling couple coming to sell their bikes and that’s how i found my bike. For 200$ I would get a helmet, poncho, bag holder and 108cc, 4 gears of Honda engineering from the year 1978 (I later found out that my bike was Chinese Vietnamese). I realized this was the best deal I would find and urgent to get going the next day so I just bought it on the spot.

Accidentally took a picture of myself taking a picture

So proud of my bike that I accidentally took a picture of myself taking a picture of my bike


Cockpit of the dream. Lights, indicator, horn. On the right, panel- and light switch and the electric start.

Tips for the motorcycle journey:

First of all and the best tip I can give you is:
Don’t think of it as buying a bike, think about it as renting a bike.
That’s effectively what you are doing and it is pretty obvious, I still made this mistake.

This is why it doesn’t matter whether you go for the cheapest one or the more expensive one. You are just renting it.
My deal: Expect to win ~40$
I had a good deal: Was it worth it? Probably not.

If I am going to spend 70 hours sitting on a bike it is worth it to me invest a little bit to get a worse deal.
I should have gone for a higher end bike. Maybe cost 350$ resale 300$.
Compared to the other deal: Lose 90$, rental price about a euro more/driving hour.

Saving in the wrong spot. As an afterthought though. Buying my bike was a great decision, it is more bad ass to do it on a crappy bike than an excellent one. You and your bike will go through the challenges together it will make it more memorable.

The gear:

Cycling gloves.
I was going to invest in some real gloves and walked in to a Ducati shop and asked the price on some good looking gloves. 4,6 Million dongs (220$), the gloves actually costed more than my BIKE! I opted for cycling gloves for 200k, they look ridiculous but provide good comfort and they may save your entire trip if you fall. I ended up liking the open fingers a lot, really good for handling the GPS while driving.

Dustcover for mouth (Vietnamese face mask).
Filters a most of the diesel smells and protects you from the sun. Get some clothing with long sleeves that not only protect you from getting burnt, they also protect you a bit if you fall.

Hipster glasses.
In nighttime there’s billion flies somehow being magnetized in to your eyes. They will also block the from the dust the incoming traffic will throw at you.

Obviously get mobile internet. GPS. Google translate. Mobile charger.

If you have a lot of turns on your journey, just plugin your earphones with a GPS and all you have to do is drive.


This will do


Get confident on your bike: These roads are a bit of a death wish. You will encounter everything you could imagine. Animals, people driving the wrong way, potholes everywhere, mental aggressive tourist bus drivers and insane traffic. You have to be really confident with your bike control, dodging obstacles and putting your bike to where you wan’t it to go.

Don’t expect to cover more than 30 km an hour: This is a rule I find to be true every time I set out somewhere. Google maps doesn’t calculate the driving estimations very well. A road Google thinks is 60 km/h, might be full of holes and bumps. They obviously haven’t been to Vietnam 🙂

Get insured: If I were to do it again I would get an international drivers permit to get coverage from the insurance company. Normally I am against getting any kind of insurance, the are basically for scared people who pay premium for a stupid service. In this situation however it can very well turn out to be a winning deal.

Don’t be afraid to get lost: With a bike you have the freedom to go anywhere you wan’t, be creative. You see the real Vietnam by going off the main roads. You will quickly learn to distinguish whether you are lost from the peoples faces 🙂


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Add 2 Thai girls to the list

10/2014.  23 Yo. Thai girl from Chiang Mai Thailand.

I am having a slow night, normally I never get inside my head anymore but now I am inside and I am inside bad.

I just keep walking around the area like a fucking idiot for the longest time. Being way too selective with my approaching since I am just scared to try anything.

Finally I muster up my courage to enter an actual nightclub. And pretty much the first girl I see is giving me the eyes. Dance for some while, drink some Tonic water. The club is about to close after like maybe 20 minutes of dancing, and they want to leave, her and her friends.

At this point I completely fuck up, I don’t leave with them. I just take the stupid Facebook. I realize this a short while later and just decide to check around, they are not there. I fucked up the front door 🙁

Club closes and I go to have some noodles by myself. Some girl asks why were you just walking around?

Super pathetic :D…

Next day. I engage my new Facebook contact. At this point it has been almost entirely dancing, very minimal chatting.

I arrange to meet her at midnight, she wants to meet me in da club.

Normally I wouldn’t like this. Becoming her little dance buddy who she only sees in the nightclub.

But there’s some things making this an okay play…

1. I suspect her English is pretty bad.

2. The club is very close to my hotel.

3. I only have to dance with her an hour until the club closes.

4. She might be too uncomfortable with a regular date and might not show up.

We meet up and just start dancing and shit. She keeps messaging her friend and running around, being very hyper.

What is the issue here?

Value, comfort or bored?

I don’t think it is an issue with value after all I am from the fucking west, all I have to do is smile.

Don’t think she would just suddenly feel uncomfortable, although she could.

While she is not bored, girls just wanna pump up their night by whatever way possible.


I just follow her from a distance, not too close but having like hawk eyes on her back. Every time she stops I just magically appear.

Eventually I get her 1 on 1 and we bounce for food. She is with a scooter and somewhat drunk, no helmets.

Oh well… What wouldn’t a man do when the pussy is fresh.

We get food and at this point we finally have a chance to chill out and really talk. I realize her English is bad…

We spend some time eating some shit Thai food. I am just chilling, knowing that this moment does not matter at all.

The next big moment that matters is the pull, that is where my mind is.

Time to jump on the scooter again and drive me to my place. Let the games begin.

Drives me to hotel and she says “see you again”

Now is the most crucial moment of the whole shebang.

I always try not to sell it too much if I don’t need to.

– You can park here.

– Come inside.

– Lets listen to some Finnish rock music.

She is hesitant, I am just calming and trying to influence her just enough to tip her scale to saying yes.

Just excuses for her to grab on to so she can justify it to herself.

I get her up.

And go for the vagina.

She barrels me with test after test.

“You are a ladyboy”

“You have to wakeup early”

“No touching”

She says “Ure a ladyboy” 50 more times, I think she just doesn’t have anything else to say.

I kinda realize I have just been pushing it all the way.

I try to squeeze a little bit of genuineness out of myself and try to appear to be empathetic.

Then I just take away all the attention, making her feel bad. After a while I get back to it and the last of the clothes come off.

As I am working on it getting all this resistance, I feel the abundant moistness through her thick short jeans.

A wise man once said.

“Girls testing you is them seducing themselves”

All these tests were just foreplay. When you remain unaffected she gets wetter than the Niagra falls.

I find out that she had a bad pubic hair maintenance policy.

Anyway. Kinda awkward when they make you work for it grinding and teasing you for 3 hours and then they expect you to last for the whole night.

Not happening girls.

Never saw that girl again.




11/2014. 25 Yo. Thai girl from Chiang Mai Thailand.

It was a Saturday and I had just come to Chiang Mai from the town of Pai hunting for some nightlife action.

I thought I might as well take it easy and hangout with 10/2014.

We arrange a meetup at the club again, I get there on time and she is late.

I thought, well I am here I might as well just pimp it a little bit.

Compared to last time my mood is fantastic. I quickly hop on to a 2 girl, 1 dude group.

It seems I don’t need to do much in Thailand. Very basic, dance a bit and smile. Don’t fuck it up and stay in there.

There’s a Russian dude in the group and he is doing some very high energy kinda clowny moves.

He is engaging the girls sure, he is getting them laughing but it isn’t the kind of laughing that you want. He is seeking out these reactions and it just shows through. He is compensating. Boys understand that not every smile a girl gives you is moving you closer to the puss.

I figure out the relationship statuses pretty fast, one of them is single. That is who I am dancing with.

I got my girl pretty well included, the friend is won over too. She seems very accepting of us. I am being nice to her every once in a while trying to include her as well.

There is a couple of men seemingly competing for the friend. I don’t know why but none of them stay in there for long time, I would love it if she met somebody.

Closing time, they wan’t to go to another club. Supposedly close by. Okay, hop in to the friends car and drive somewhere.

Arrive to the club, just do the same shit. I am being too physical with my girl here, making out and shit.

It is the kind of game that looks very impressive to everybody looking over and seems to go really well, I am about to be remembered as to why overly making out is a bad idea.

After one drink we conclude that the club is full of ladyboys and leave.

I had figured out the situation, my girl lives with family so that is not an option.

I have to get the friend to drop us off.

I am in the back seat just about fingering with my girl. Drive to my hotel is pretty short.

I am under the impression that it is on and she is joining me for sure, but as we arrive to my place she gets hesitant.

Apparently she lives far away with no chance of getting back home in the morning.

“Don’t worry I can check you a buss”

“Live in the moment girl, party!”

“I will give you cab money”

“I promise we don’t have to do anything”

I just try to hit every single one of her excuses. No dice. I kinda hold back as they talk together, at this point I am pretty convinced it is game over for that night. I am leaving the very next night so I will never have the chance for coitus with her.

After she talked with her friend the friend says, she is joining you. NICE! I think the friend talked her over. It is just nice when you can turn these cockblocks to your personal cheerleaders. Cockblocks are just selfish, when you include them they don’t mind, they don’t really care for their friend.

One good thing about going hard with the escalation is that if you get her back to yours it is definitely going to happen.

First girl I have ever had who had chickens running around the lawn

I was a bit surprised when I wen’t over to hers and she had 7 month old kid. As far as I know this is the first mom I have ever had.

I wouldn’t want to go any lower on the face department than this girl but she had a nice body, which I appreciate a lot.



Men say that girls are impossible to understand. Here is women solved: Arousal junkies who only think with their pussies. This means that they’re constantly seeking emotional stimulation. They will instinctively leave you as soon as something else gets more arousing. This is also why game works, different sex, different wiring.

People ask me: Isn’t all of this a bit manipulative? Yes it is, but not in a way that you would think. If you are worth fucking its going to happen anyway. Being a closer means that you are just being more efficient with not only your time but her time as well. When i think of game i think of it as a kind of an influence from a place of fun, you could say it is a manipulation from a place of value, fully assuming you are worthy. This is not to be mistaken with manipulation from the place of non value (trying to make her like you).

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